Dating is a wonderful and scary time. For those in romantic relationships, it is important to make sure you have a healthy relationship The Lord God has given us guidelines in God’s word to make sure that our relationship is a good thing.
We want to make sure in everything we do we are following the will of God. God loves us with unconditional love, and he wants our relationships to mirror that love and shine as an example to the world of what true love looks like.
Here are 16 verses for young men to read as they are pursuing romantic relationships. As you look for the young lady who will be your life partner, these are the best Bible Verses that will help guide you
Proverbs 31:30 – Look for what matters.
“Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
We all know women who walk into a room, and everyone turns to see them. They are beautiful and charming. These are the girls that boys will fall over themselves to spend time with. You can be both physically and spiritually beautiful.
And if you find a young woman like this you are very blessed. It is important to first look at the spiritual aspect of any woman you are interested in. Eventually, beauty will fade. The charm you fall in love with can also be something that is used to trick you or manipulate you.
When a young man begins to think about girlfriend relationships it is normal to think first about what she looks like. This is a normal thing to feel.
However, as this verse from the World of God reminds us a strong relationship is not built on looks. A pure heart is much more valuable than a good figure. Make sure you are looking for a young woman who fears God.
If you want to know the truth, then ask someone you trust what they think of the young woman you are interested in. Your mother and father are a great place to start. Seek the guidance of others and pray.
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 – What is Love?
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
What is love? This is the first question you have to answer. We can not proceed in a relationship if we do not know what love is. The Word of God shows us what true love looks like. God’s love is an example to us of love.
Love is hard work, it is not just a feeling, it is a choice we make every day. Great love is something that will change our lives and give us the healing we need in difficult times. Deep love guides others into spiritual growth. Our love for each other is a living sacrifice each day, putting the needs of the other in front of our own.
If we love others, we will be patient with them, we will show them kindness. If they do well in something or receive a gift, we will be happy for them.
Love is humble. Love builds up the other person and does not tear them down. If we love someone, we won’t want to always get our way, and we won’t get angry easily over every little thing. We also won’t bring up things from their past.
This is how you should be treating your girlfriend; it is also how you should expect to be treated yourself.
Ephesians 4:2-3 –Love brings unity.
“Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.”
Being humble and gentle is how we live when we are showing love to others. As a young man begins his journey of falling in love with a young woman, he needs to look beyond the dating years.
He needs to ask himself, is this my future wife, the mother of my children, the lady who will hold the family together? To have a happy family you need a mother who is humble, gentle, and patient.
This is a description of someone who will be an excellent wife. A lady who does what she needs to do to keep unity and peace in the home. A woman who always seeks her own way and is not led by the Holy Spirit is not a woman you want to build a life together with.
Use this passage of scripture to guide you in your choice of who to date. Don’t start a relationship with someone until you are sure this is the person who will bring peace into your life.
1 Corinthians 13:13 – Have faith, hope, and love.
“And now these three remain faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love.”
In our relationships, we must have faith in each other. We must hope for our future, and we must love each other. But out of all three of these, love is the most important one. That is because if we truly love a person then we will have faith in them, and we will be faithful.
If we love each other, we will hope together for the future, and if we truly love each other we will care for one another. Faith, Hope, and love are a threefold cord that our relationships need to grow. We already looked at what love is in an earlier passage.
In our relationships, we should strive to have all three of these. We should be faithful, hope together, and love. If you can find someone who strives to do all three of these things together then you have found a good woman. Don’t let someone like that get away.
Proverbs 20:7 – Think towards marriage and children.
“The righteous lead blameless lives; blessed are their children after them.”
Remember, your girlfriend will one day be your wife and the mother of your children. This is why it is so vital that you find a young woman who wants to please God and tries to live a blameless life.
That means you as a young man need to also make sure you are not following the works of the flesh. You must save sexual intimacy for after the marriage vows. As a man, it is your job to make sure the relationship is free from sexual sin.
If you are dating a woman who wants to live her life for God, then you must honor that by living your life in the same way. The reward for this will be found in the future when your children are blessed by the family you have built.
Proverbs 3:3-4 – A good relationship will lead to a good reputation.
“Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. Then you will win favor and a good name in the sight of God and man.”
The most important thing in your relationship with your girlfriend is that you remain faithful. Both of you need to make sure that you are faithful to each other, to the vows you made to God stay away from sexual relations, and to keep God as the center of your relationship.
To have a healthy relationship we must make sure that we are always putting God first. When we remain faithful, we will have a reputation of being faithful, which will mean that not only we will have favor with God, but also with others.
We will have a good name and a good reputation. You want to make sure that as a couple you are well respected. That comes with being faithful.
1 John 4:19 – God’s love shows us how to love.
“We love because he first loved us.”
The fact that we are capable of love comes from God. It is because of his love for us that we can show love to others. It is only after we truly understand the good news of Jesus Christ that we can love others the way we are meant to love.
When we don’t feel God’s love around us then will struggle to remember how to love others. But when we understand that we are accepted by God then we can accept others, when we experience God’s forgiveness, we can forgive others. When we know our value in God then we can value others.
If you are in a long-term relationship this is even more true. We need to show God’s love and be willing to put the needs of the other person before us.
Colossians 3:14 – God’s love will bring us unity.
“And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.”
When we love each other, that love will bind us in a unity that will keep us strong together. When we allow ourselves to get our feelings hurt and refuse to forgive each other then this will lead to a damaged relationship.
We will start to keep our distance from each other. and that is how we end up with an unhealthy relationship. True love will lead you away from pride and anger and will lead you toward peace and humility.
Proverbs 18:13 – Learn how to listen.
“To answer before listening—that is folly and shame.”
There will come a time when you argue with your girlfriend, no matter how much you love each other. This is a normal thing to happen.
But what we have to remember is that in each argument we have to make sure that we are listening. When I say listening, I don’t mean pausing from talking until it is our turn. I mean truly listening to what the other person has to say.
When we are upset, we often care more about hearing ourselves talk than listening to what the other person has to say. When we act this way during an argument, we will have an immature relationship. We will be acting shameful.
If you want to have a mature relationship that is pure then make sure you’re taking time to listen to each other, take the time to think about what you have heard before you speak. This will guide you.
Ephesians 4:26-27 – Deal with your anger in a healthy way
“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.”
Being angry is not a sin. It is a normal emotion we all face. God does however give us guidelines for how to act when we are feeling angry. God tells us to be Angry and do not sin. That means we can be angry and not sin. However, God also wants us to deal with the issue that is causing us to be angry.
This could be a miscommunication and we could be angry about something we think happened that did not happen. Or perhaps you did something that requires an apology, or perhaps your girlfriend did something that requires an apology.
Taking the time to communicate with each other and find the solution to what has caused you to become angry will be a habit that you will find useful as your relationship grows.
Proverbs 15:1 – Control your words.
“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”
The golden rule of every relationship is to answer an argument with gentleness. We need to always be gentle. In the moment of anger or frustration, our bodies will often go into either flight or fight mode.
We will want to match the other person’s anger with our anger which is equal or worse. But if we answer instead with gentleness then we will be able to guide the conversation towards kindness and not wrath. This is a skill that takes time to learn.
This is why parents have to teach these skills to their children at a very young age. If you see that as a couple, you are constantly having many fights that turn to harsh words and anger then this is something that needs to be addressed.
If your relationship is going to continue, then you both need to find ways to work through this. Take time when you are not angry to plan what you will do in anger. Make sure that you are answering with gentleness.
1 Peter 4:8 – Love the way God commands even if the relationship comes to an end.
“Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.”
Love deeply. What does that mean? Deep love is the kind of love that forgives easily and does not hold a grudge. This kind of love will cover a multitude of sins. Love will mean we will not gossip about the sins of others or be confrontational about sins.
Love will want to protect the other person; this includes not wanting to hurt their reputation. It is important to remember that love does not mean we do not set personal boundaries, or that we allow people to ignore our boundaries.
We love, we forgive, but we do not allow ourselves to be mistreated. If you are being mistreated, then it is time to walk away from the relationship. But even in walking away from the relationship we still want to show them, love, by not destroying their reputation.
Proverbs 22:24-25 – Do not date a person with a temper.
“Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person, do not associate with one easily angered, or you may learn their ways and get yourself ensnared.”
A person who has a lack of self-control is a person you should avoid. In your life, you are going to come across hard times. If you are in a relationship with someone who can not handle the hard times without losing her temper this is a person who will be a bad company for you. You need a person who will be the same in hard times and in good times.
A young lady with good morals who will be peaceful and loving. If the lady, you are pursuing has a temper regularly then you need to think about walking away from such a relationship. Take time apart and pray for each other. Let her spend time with God learning to deal with her anger issues. You should only continue a relationship once you are both able to control emotions.
If you are a person who has a temper, then you are not ready to have a relationship. You must be able to control your temper and communicate effectively before you can start a relationship. Entering a relationship before you have learned to control your temper will lead to pain, for you and for the person you love.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-11 – God does not want us to be alone.
“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone?” –
A friend loves at all times. When a person is alone then in the hard times they will most likely fail. We need each other to live in peace and strength.
This is why God created relationships. God created families, communities, and the church. He created us to seek communities, and to want to be with others. Even the most introverted people thrive to be with someone and not be alone.
The reason is found in this passage of God’s word. We know that if we fall, we need someone in our life to help us up. If we are cold, we want someone to keep us warm. We don’t want to go to be alone, we want to be with a person who loves us.
God created us this way, it is not a sign of weakness. When God sends you someone to love thank Him.
John 13:34 – Jesus showed us how to love.
Love is the last commandment the Lord gave to His disciples. He told them: “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.”
How do you show love to your girlfriend in a way that is honoring God? Jesus said we should love others the way he loved us. God wants you to be willing to lay down your life for each other. To put your desires and hopes aside to fulfill the hopes and desires of your loved one.
When we both put our desires and hopes aside and look to love the other person in the relationship then will have peace and success. God said that greater love has no one than this, that a man lays down his life for a friend. This is the great love we all want. They love to seek the well-being of each other more than us.
God demonstrated this kind of love to us. He showed us what love is supposed to look like by loving us. He left the glories of heaven to live here on earth to feel pain, sadness, and hunger.
He lived his life putting mankind before his own needs, and then he laid down his life to die for the forgiveness of our sins. This is true love and the love God wants us to show to others. Our families would be stronger and healthier if we all showed this kind of love to each other.
2 Corinthians 6:14 – You can not date an unbeliever.
“Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?” –
This is our last verse, and our most important one. You can not have a good relationship with someone who is not a follower of Jesus Christ.
If you want to live your life following the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, and the person you are partnering in life with does not care what the Bible says, then you will have the type of relationship that is full of problems.
Relationship problems come when we look at the world from two different points of view. If you want to live your life to the glory of God, you need a life partner who has the same goals.
When we are dating it might seem like not that big of a deal. But throughout marriage, child-rearing, and life we want to have a partner who has the same worldview as us. As we strive to live our lives to please God we need to be built up by others who also want to please God and live for him. You will build each other up and help each other grow closer to God.